Superstition

I'm in the throes of another challenge in my script. Galilea, the hack, feels that her short has bad karma. She wants to clear the energy so she embarks on every religious ritual she can find. Again, it's hard to make this funny. I've been looking up "good luck", "karma", "feng shui". Invariably these sites and concepts raise my ire.

Throw salt over your shoulder.

Knock on wood.

Rub your "crystal".

Don't sleep across from the door.

So I'm looking at this ad for Tiffany and Co. I hate those ads. Anything with: "If he loves you he'll buy you this." "Every kiss begins with . . ." It turns my stomach.

In the ad, the beautiful young woman looks ahead like a child in ecstasy. She wears tasteful diamond earrings, ring and bracelet. The man who presumably gave her these beautiful objects gazes at her with adoration.

The message: If someone loved you like this guy loves her he'd give you the same stuff.

So I'm imagining the stay at home lady. She needs proof of his love, validation. She pressures the man in her life to produce. "I want the little blue box. Give me something from Tiffany's. I love Tiffany's. Oooh, pleeeeease."

He goes out. He buys the jewelry. He puts it on her. She adores it. She adores him for giving it to her. This ceremony works because she believes in it. This is our culture's rite of the religion of romantic love. It's real and as valid as any superstition any culture has ever created. It's also as ugly and as fake. (I believe it comes from fear.) It's a testament to the human inability to think and feel and believe in invisible things. It's not real unless you light a candle and hold an amulet in your hand. It's impossible to get people to stop worshipping false idols.

How do you make that funny?